Red Flags, Memes, and Men Who Shouldn’t Have My Number
I went on a date recently.
He was charming enough at first—decent conversation, a few laughs, and the kind of smile that makes you think, “Maybe?” But then came the texts afterwards. The unsolicited commentary. The memes that felt more like manifestos. And suddenly, I wasn’t swooning…I was screenshotting.
It got me thinking: how many of us have ignored that first red flag because we wanted to believe in the potential? How many of us have laughed off the cringe, only to realize later that our gut was right all along? I had thought about cancelling and wished I hadn’t ignored the signs!
This post is for anyone who’s ever second-guessed themselves after a weird text, anyone who’s ever ghosted with good reason, and anyone still holding out hope for the kind of connection that doesn’t make you want to throw your phone into a lake.
Let’s break it down—red flags, green flags, and everything in between!
Let’s be honest. Dating in the modern world is like scrolling through a clearance rack of emotional unavailability, unsolicited opinions, and men who think “negging” is still a thing. But every now and then, one stands out. Not because he’s charming. Not because he’s different. But because he manages to wave every red flag in the book before you’ve even finished your appetizer.
This post is dedicated to that guy.
The one who:
Sends a text about how he couldn’t aver his eyes from your hard nipples like he’s auditioning for a role in a bad 2003 rom-com.
Follows it up with a meme about how women are the problem.
And somehow thinks this is flirting.
Spoiler alert: it’s not.
In this post, we’re breaking down the warning signs, decoding the cringe, and celebrating the moment you hit “block”. Because ghosting isn’t always rude—sometimes, it’s self-care.
How to Spot a Walking Red Flag in the Wild 🚩🚩🚩
Your guide to avoiding emotional potholes disguised as potential partners.
Mentions “crazy exes” within the first 10 minutes
If every woman he’s dated was “crazy,” chances are the common denominator isn’t them.
Says he “doesn’t believe in labels” but wants all the benefits of a relationship
Translation: He wants girlfriend energy without boyfriend accountability.
Sends unsolicited spicy commentary
If he can’t respect boundaries in a text, imagine what he’s like in real life. Hard pass.
Thinks TikTok is a feminist conspiracy
If he’s quoting “alpha male” podcasts and blaming women for the downfall of society… run. Preferably in cute sneakers.
Uses memes as emotional armor
If he can’t express a real feeling without hiding behind a meme, he’s not emotionally available—he’s just WiFi-enabled.
Says “you’re not like other girls”
This is not a compliment. It’s a subtle dig at other women and a setup for future disappointment.
Gives off “I’m the victim of modern dating” vibes
If he’s already bitter before the appetizer arrives, you’re not on a date—you’re in a therapy session you didn’t sign up for.
Green Flags: The Ones Who Just Get It
Because emotional maturity is the new sexy.
He listens—like, actually listens
Not just waiting for his turn to talk. He remembers the little things, like your favorite coffee order or that story about your great-grandfather’s porch mischief.
He respects boundaries without making it weird
You say, “not tonight,” and he says “of course.” No guilt trips. No passive-aggressive sighs. Just grown-up energy.
He’s emotionally self-aware
He doesn’t blame “all women” for his past. He’s done the work. He knows his patterns. And he’s not afraid to talk about feelings without turning it into a TED Talk.
He makes you feel safe being soft
You don’t have to armor up. You can be goofy, vulnerable, quiet, loud—you. And he meets you there, without trying to fix or shrink you.
He’s consistent
No hot-and-cold games. No disappearing acts. Just steady, clear communication that doesn’t leave you spiraling.
He celebrates your independence
He’s not intimidated by your ambition, your voice, or your past. He’s proud of you for being whole on your own—and still choosing to let him in.
He makes you laugh without making you the punchline
Humor that lifts you up, not cuts you down. Bonus points if he can laugh at himself and still look good doing it.
Here’s to the ones who text with intention, flirt with respect, and know that real connection isn’t built on games—it’s built on presence.
And to the red flags? Thanks for the content.
